Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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