what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
