dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
