if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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