your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
