Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
