i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
This is my gift to your gina
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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