the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
