The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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