Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize