drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Is her dick bigger than yours?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
