Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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