News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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