Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
