Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
