problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize