hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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