i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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