she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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