I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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