Im at strip club and am horny
if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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