I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Randomize
