Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Randomize
