google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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