My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
