Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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