It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
The uberlube is also flammable
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
