He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize