It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
then he tried to convert me to islam
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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