She's like a pop up book from hell.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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