Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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