My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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