Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
