cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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