the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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