is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
