Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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