i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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