I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize