Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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