I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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