What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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