i need an iv and a liver transplant
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
