Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
