people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Less talking, more tequila
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Randomize