Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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