We're facebook friends in real life
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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