so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
