Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
