You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
